A Leap In The Dark
“All growth is a leap in the dark, a spontaneous, unpremeditated act
without benefit of experience.” -Henry Miller
If only we could plan it. Life, growth, change. Our elders tried to explain it, tried to give us the wisdom of their experience; but the fact is that most things we have to live out for ourselves. If only we could find an easier, softer way! If only we didn’t have to trust so much when we go into the freefall of life. But that’s not how God made it. Especially during Lent, when God asks us to drop our old lives and fly…
Alan Paton, the South African author of Cry, The Beloved Country, caught the very essence of this… from the elder’s perspective… as he sees his son going forth…
I Hold The Bandages and Ointments Ready -Alan Paton
I see my son is wearing long trousers, I tremble at this;
I see he goes forward confidently, he does not know
so fully his own gentleness.
Go forward, eager and reverent child, see here I begin
to take my hands away from you,
I shall see you walk careless on the edges of the
precipice, but if you wish you shall hear no word
come out of me;
My whole soul will be sick with apprehension, but
I shall not disobey you.
Life sees you coming, she sees you come with
assurance towards her,
She lies in wait for you, she cannot but hurt you;
Go forward, go forward, I hold the bandages and
ointments ready,
And if you would go elsewhere and lie alone with
your wounds, why I shall not intrude upon you,
If you would seek the help of some other person, I
shall not come forcing myself upon you.
If you should fall into sin, innocent one, that is the
way of this pilgrimage;
Struggle against it, not for one fraction of a moment
concede its dominion.
It will occasion you grief and sorrow, it will torment you,
But hate not God, nor turn from Him in shame or
self-reproach;
He has seen many such, His compassion is as great
as His Creation.
Be tempted and fall and return, return and be tempted
and fall
A thousand times and a thousand, even to a thousand
thousand.
For out of this tribulation there comes a peace, deep
in the soul, and surer than any dream…